Such thing as Soulmates?

There is no such thing as soul mates. Let me tell you why.

This video provided the information that 70% of U.S. citizens believe in soulmates. Which is pretty interesting considering how small the number of actual eligible partners really is. Out of the billions of people in the world an individual only meets about 10,000 people in their lifetime, and the amount of people in that group that they would actually consider dating is very small. So to think there is only one person out there for you can be very overwhelming. What if you move to the wrong state? or transfer to the wrong school, or pick the wrong job, or take the wrong way home from work? All these minor details could make all the difference in “finding your person” if having a soulmate was the only way to truly be happy and fall in love./’

Fortunately this is a false belief. I already believed this but this week in class I learned how incredibly farfetched this idea really is. Sociologists refer to this false belief as “romantic idealism”, or the myth of the perfect mate. When 70% of U.S citizens believe in soulmates, 80% of individuals under 30 believe in soulmates. I believe this misconception starts with the media and false representations of relationships. I found it interesting when the TED talk showed a graph that revealed that 94% of young adults look to television for advice on love. Showing that we as young people get most of our ideas and advice on love from unrealistic role models. Scripted scenes of two star-crossed lovers finally finding their way to each other, and Hollywood actors pretending to fall in love with “the one” that was hired to play the part. These movies and shows are ruining real romance. Real romance looks like getting to know someone and seeing if you like them and could fall in love with them, and then fighting for a healthy relationship with that person, and maybe ending it if you realize it isn’t working. Real romance is hard work, and requires a lot of give and take. Thinking someone out there is waiting for you and everything will just fall into place is very unhealthy and unrealistic.

I believe in love, and I think we all should believe in love because investing in relationships with other people is what gives us purpose. I think from a sociological stand point we need to fight to represent realistic relationships in the media. We also need to accept all the different types of relationships and represent them equally in the media. Because love is why are lives matter, all sorts of love, romantic or not it’s why life matters.

Maggie Fredricks

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